The Key is still Working

 I used to seriously binge daily, thousands of calories. Slowly but surely, with a lot of therapy and learning how to look at my feelings it became a little less, but at some point I was having 400 to 800 calorie binges still at least 3 times a week if not more like every day. I wondered how I ever was going to get over them.

I had been prediabetic for a long time and got diagnosed with diabetes about 8 years ago. And I realized recently that part of those binges was the sugar rollercoaster. I was eating sugar, and then my body would release huge amounts of insulin, my blood sugar would crash, and I'd want to eat more sugar. And this kept going, until my doc put me on insulin. I don't know how it works exactly, the theory would say that insulin doesn't help, because it would crash my blood sugar. But it doesn't..

With insulin I finally feel balanced. It doesn't crash me the way my own body did and my sugars are very even and balanced with the right doses. And.. the binges are gone. I can't explain it. I still have a huge sweet tooth and have something sugar free that is sweet every day, but i can leave it at that thing instead of eating the entire box.

It's been about 3 months binge free right now and about 18 lbs lost. I am still scared to write about this miracle for fear it might go away again. But three months is a good time. I wish I knew why this did it for me, but I'm not going to look a gift horse in the mouth. Finally being able to lose weight is in reach! With binges you think it's not even any use, but without, I've felt hope. 

This was written on May 22, 2017

 (comment from Amaranth13: Unfortunately it didn't last)

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